This morning I was standing in the courtyard waiting for Sasha after home room hoping she would come talk to me, but she never showed up.  I always knew if she was planning to miss school, but I hadn’t heard a word from her since our conversation yesterday.  She disappeared so quickly after English I wasn’t able to talk to her and she didn’t answer the phone last night.  I called Guy and Margo, but they said she was already sleeping.  

 

I peered across to the main entrance after I heard my named called from across the way.  Alexis was making her way over, with her curls bouncing as she struggled to pull them in a high ponytail.  She picked up her speed and ran over.  How about this chick gonna come up to me and be like “So you hooked up with a guy named Enrique in Bermuda?!”  Very loudly I may add.  

 

“Dang Alexis where you been?!  And where’s Sierra?”  I tried my best to avoid her question, glancing around making sure no one could hear her.  Alexis and Sierra are my girls.  We’re not as close as Sasha and I, but they’ve always been solid.  I knew they would miss the first day of school and be late whenever they decided to come.

 

“Also, that was sooo literally like yesterday.”  I said in my best valley girl voice.

 

“I know we missed everything yesterday, but I was not about to rush to get back here.”  

 

“Jami you messed with ole boy over there?!”  Sierra just appeared out of nowhere.

 

“He looking spicy!  How was it, cause you know I want to holla!”  She tried to dap me with her tongue hanging out.

 

“Sierra, no!  He’s a liar.”

 

“I mean the whole school saying he hit it and quit it.”  Sierra gave me that duh look.

 

“What do you mean?  He’s saying we actually did the deed?”

 

I felt so exposed, so naked, and ashamed over something that never happened.  Of course, Hamilton, the biggest hater ever had to come put her two cents in my business with her rat faced friends Chloe and Meghan.

 

“I told you James.  You need to keep the legs closed.  I guess Bradley wasn’t wrong after all?  He said you were easy and you wanted to argue with me, because he wanted someone more conservative with her body than the freshman, oops I guess now the sophomore slut.  Well anyway Brads old news now.  I got my eyes on some carne asada.”  Hamilton looked over towards where Enrique was standing laughing with some other guys.  She pursed her lips staring at Enrique like he was something delicious to eat.

 

“You know what Hamilton you can believe whatever lies you want, but all I hear is you keep admitting that you’re the true slut.  So go ahead have another dosage of my sloppy seconds.”  Hamilton turned to walk towards me, but Alexis and Sierra came and stood in front of me, blocking Hamilton, Chloe and Meghan with their six foot frames.

 

They knew to keep walking, because Alexis and Sierra would’ve stomped them no problem.  They are always willing and ready to fight.  I know I’m not that way and I don’t like fighting, but I’m glad they are my girls because they keep it real and they never lie.  

 

As the day went on I continued to get worried and frustrated, because I could not find Sasha.  She wasn’t in the courtyard for our normal meetup before school started and she wasn’t in first or second period.  She finally showed up to gym, but she wouldn’t say anything to me, not even make eye contact.  I was going to confront her at lunch, but Hamilton had to act real stupid once I stepped foot in the cafeteria.

 

All I could think about was Sasha and Lucas, which is not normal, but I know what it feels like to be hurt.  I just wanted to figure out where her head was and make sure she was okay.  I came behind her as she was crossing the threshold to the lunch room.

 

“Hey Sash…”

 

“James!”  Then a loud slap came across my back side.

 

“Hamilton what the world do you think you’re doing?!”  I felt rage brewing.  

 

“Enrique said it felt good to tap that.”  She was smirking so wide.  

 

“I must it admit that did feel good.”  She giggled, placing her hand over her mouth innocently.

 

I saw Enrique sitting over with the same group of guys from the morning laughing again, but this time they were looking at me.  The whole cafeteria was staring at me.  I felt tears coming in my eyes.  I don’t know why I have to cry when I get upset, but I lost it right there.

 

“You know what!”  I was yelling at the top of my lungs.  The whole place went silent.

 

“Yes, I went to Bermuda this summer!  I also went to space camp, bible camp where I met this wonderful guy named Andrew by the way, who’s a lot more mature than this loser!  Then I went to my grandparent’s in North Carolina and then I finally had a little fun on a beautiful island.  Where I met a great guy, or so I thought, and his wonderful family.  We talked, we laughed, we made out a lot, and on our last night there I told this so called wonderful guy that I loved him and he left me sitting there, feeling like a complete idiot, totally hurt and embarrassed!  And I did contemplate losing my VIRGINITY to this JERK!  But here I am the laughing stock of the whole school and I’m still a virgin.”

 

I saw all those eyes on me.  The band geeks, the jocks, the druggies, Mr. Callesano.  My eyes went foggy when a hand pulled me out of the spotlight and led me out of the cafeteria.  I let go of their hand and ran as fast as I could.  I heard the voice of a guy ask me I was okay, but I just kept running, not turning back to see who had come to my rescue.  

 

So the universe won again.  This day was just so sucky.  In English Mr. Callesano seemed like he pitied me and just let me be.  I guess he and I are kindred spirits.  I can’t believe I’m friends with someone who’s just so careless with someone else’s heart.  I needed to talk to Sasha, but not now.  I was too upset.

 

I called Andrew again, but still not a working number.  I can’t believe I wrote his number down wrong.  Or maybe I got fake numbered?  I guess it’s just not meant to be and I should just let it go and stop trying to force it.